“Almost the whole of Christian teaching is humility” (St. Augustine).

The most humbling experience of my life so far has been becoming a mother. Never in my life have I realized so clearly how dependent I am on God and how inadequate I am on my own. Being humbled in this way is, of course, painful and difficult—but it is also such a gift to realize how much I need to grow in this virtue and to receive the grace, through being a wife and mother (and the sacrament of Confession), to do so.

In fact, I’m becoming an avid student of the virtue of humility, hungry to learn as much as I can about how to fight my strong natural inclination toward pride. Ascension Press’ new book “Humble Strength: The Eye-Opening Benefits of Humility” is a great tool in this learning process. Written by Dr. Kevin Vost, a Catholic psychologist, Thomist, and author, it is an accessible, informative, and even humorous look at humility and how to grow in it.

Humility Starts With Self-awareness

Contrary to popular opinion, humility is not self-loathing. Rather, Vost explains, humility is acute self-awareness—it’s knowing both your weaknesses (where you must rely on God to grow in virtue) and your strengths (the gifts that God has given you and how you can use them for his glory).

“Learn from me,” Jesus tells us, “for I am meek and humble of heart” (Matthew 11:29). Jesus turned tables. He contradicted the elite. He called people out. He was a leader who was sure of himself, his purpose, and his value. And, he suffered and died for us. He was fully divine and completely humble.

Of course, as sinful human beings, we will never be as humble as Jesus—but Vost shares a clear path, grounded in Scripture and the writings of the saints (particularly St. Thomas Aquinas), of how to grow in humility through the grace of God.

Humility and Magnanimity

Vost makes the case that humility is the foundation for all the other virtues, because it enables us to see ourselves clearly and then ask God for help in growing in virtue. One interesting example he provides is the way that “humility magnifies magnanimity.”

St. Thomas Aquinas defined magnanimity as the “stretching forth of the soul to great things.” How, then, can humility work together with magnanimity? Because it acknowledges that our soul cannot stretch to great things on its own; it needs God. It also tells us “that God has provided the potential for greatness of soul in every one of our neighbors, as much as, or more than, he has for ourselves,” Vost writes.

So, then, humility enables us to strive for greatness in cooperation with the Holy Spirit and to support and celebrate others as they strive for greatness as well. It helps us to know how we should strive and what we should strive for—no more, no less.

“One of the Greatest Cures for Social Fears”

When I prayed the Litany of Humility the first time, I was struck by how many lines in the litany seemed specifically written to address my social anxiety. Upon further reflection, it makes sense; this mental illness tells me, “Everyone is noticing and criticizing you.” The Litany of Humility asks God to deliver me from the desire not to be criticized.

Similarly, Vost writes, “Would you believe that one of the greatest cures for social fears—fears that other people might ignore, reject, ridicule, or persecute us—is humility?” It helps us to focus on what we are doing, not how people are seeing us while we’re doing it. It helps us to say, “I might well fall this time, being but ‘ashes to ashes, dust to dust,’ but I will get up to work harder and try again, not forgetting that in the long run ‘I can do all things in him who strengthens me’ (Philippians 4:13),” he adds.

Now, I’m not saying that praying the Litany of Humility is all I need. I also see a therapist and believe that anyone who struggles with mental illness should see one as well. Having a mental illness is not a sin, but asking God to help me grow in humility is a crucial step in healing.

For a thorough introduction to what Scripture, the Catechism, and the saints tell us about humility—as well as an engaging discussion of how to grow in this important virtue—pick up a copy of “Humble Strength.” It will help you become a better leader, a better friend, a better wife and mother, and a better Christian woman.

Taryn DeLong is a Catholic wife and mother in North Carolina who encourages women to live out their feminine genius as co-president and managing editor of Catholic Women in Business, a FEMM fertility awareness instructor, and a contributor to publications for Catholic women. She enjoys curling up with a cup of Earl Grey and a good novel, playing the piano, and taking walks in the sunshine with her family. Connect with her on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn, or read her blog, Everyday Roses.