Humble Executive Presence: Being a Confident Catholic Leader

“A humble soul does not trust itself, but places all its confidence in God” (St. Faustina).

What do you think of when you read the words “executive presence”?

Perhaps a tall woman (maybe a former fashion model) with a chignon, wearing Louboutin stilettos and a Chanel suit. She coolly steps into the board room, and everyone stops talking. Some even stop breathing. This woman glances around the room, sits down with a slight smile, and basks in the tsunami of admiration.

Or, maybe your brain goes to Miranda Priestly from “The Devil Wears Prada.”

Both are wrong.

The pursuit of executive presence is not permission to be haughty, stuck-up, self-absorbed, or annoying. It’s executive presence — not pretension and not perfection.

The purpose of executive presence is to inspire confidence in others about yourself as a leader. When people trust you, they can relax and get down to work (or write checks with your name on them). Your job is to help others feel excited to be on your team.

Think of executive presence like a filter that helps you decide how to show up, what to say, and how to say it. Ask yourself, “Does this inspire trust and confidence?” If the answer is no, then you’re either intimidating, at one extreme, or disheartening, at the other. 

Putting yourself down does not inspire others to follow you. Neither does trying to come across as perfect. In boardrooms, sales meetings, or networking events, executive presence communicates that you are confident enough to forget yourself and, instead, focus your energies on others.

As they say, “Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.”

Executive presence is a skill anyone can cultivate. Let’s look at two essential ingredients of executive presence. Then, I’ll share a handy Swiss Army knife phrase to accelerate your skill development.

Ingredient 1: Calm

Leaders with executive presence are the acting adults in the room, regardless of age. No matter what is going on — a reorganization, the entrance of a new competitor, technology botches, gaffes, or brain fog — leaders with executive presence keep calm (unless there’s a fire). If you’re freaking out, so will others. Go to the bathroom and calm yourself down before everyone starts hyperventilating.

Before showing up at an event or a meeting where you want to inspire confidence, take a few minutes to calm your mind. Clarify the purpose of the gathering and the core message you want to communicate, and remind yourself to be attentive to connecting with others.

Right before you enter the room, adjust your posture. The way you hold your body is the first thing people notice. You’re an ambassador for your organization and a daughter of the King. Act like it!

Ingredient 2. Charisma

Before you start that email to tell me you’re not charismatic, reframe charisma as “caring passion.” If you are not excited about your job, your company, or your project, then no one else will be excited, either.

A leader with charisma actually cares about her work and her organization. She knows the value the company is offering (even if the company is just her.) Her focus is outward.

Think of your thinking like the camera on your cell phone. If your focus (like the camera lens) is on yourself, you’re too absorbed with what others think about you. Presence and neediness (which is annoying) cannot coexist in the same person at the same time. Flip the focus outward, and you become engrossed in building up others and selling the value of your project to benefit them.

Here’s a phrase to build executive presence in your humble self: Even if.

You already know perfection is a trap. You probably have a lot on your plate, even aside from the business in front of you. Your tool to manage these distractions, beginning with the way you talk to yourself, is the “even if” phrase.

You can inspire confidence, even if your hair is a wreck. (I’m vouching from personal experience.)

Your presentation can be home-run successful, even if you forgot to say seven different things you meant to say.

Your project is making the world a better place, even if you’re behind schedule and over budget.

You can build excitement about your business, even if you’re scared silly.

Finally, executive presence is not about you. It’s a way of being that you choose to model so that you are able to help others. The world desperately thirsts for your light and leadership. It does not need your neediness, doubts, or insecurities; people already trip over their own weaknesses.

Even if you don’t have all the answers, you have an in with Infinite Intelligence. Be the beacon. Use your executive presence to inspire trust.

Laura Mixon Camacho, Ph.D., sometimes called the “Communication Contessa,” teaches YOU how to better communicate with anyone. She wants all conversations carried out with style and enthusiasm. And a presentation is just a special conversation. Laura creates quirky, interactive, intense communication workshops and privately coaches leaders to accelerate their professional success. She is a member of the Forbes Council of Coaches and BetterUp Coaches and a Catholic Women in Business mentor. For more of Laura’s communication savvy, visit https://mixonian.com.