Prayer as a Working Mom: 4 Strategies to Fill Your Reservoir
“If then you are wise, you will show yourself rather as a reservoir than as a canal. A canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, and a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus without loss to itself communicates its superabundant water” (St. Bernard of Clairvaux).
“I Thirst”: Using Our Gifts to Quench Christ’s Thirst
In a message by Pope St. John Paul II for Lent 1993, the great pope called the Church to reflect on Jesus’ words, “I thirst” (John 19:28) and “Give me a drink” (John 4:7). In these words, he wrote, ‘we hear a cry from the poor, especially those who did not have access to clean water’. In a subsequent letter to the Missionaries of Charity, St. Teresa of Calcutta (then simply known as Mother Teresa) elaborated on this message:
“‘I thirst’ is something much deeper than Jesus just saying ‘I love you.’ Until you know deep inside that Jesus thirsts for you — you can’t begin to know who He wants to be [for] you. Or who He wants you to be for Him.”
This Lent, Catholic Women in Business invites you to reflect with us on how Jesus thirsts for each one of us and how we can quench His thirst — through prayer, through sacrifice, through loving His children who are most in need (and there are so many this Lent in particular!). In our content this season, we’ll be exploring how, as Catholic professionals, we can begin to understand “who He wants to be” for us, “who He wants [us] to be for Him,” and how we can share His great love for us all with everyone we encounter.
I was on the phone with a friend — a fellow work-from-home mom — when she exasperatedly asked, “Is it even possible? Finding any sort of work-life balance with little kids?!”
The myth of the “woman who has it all” can make us feel inadequate, frustrated, and — let’s be honest — often ungrateful. Whether we are a work-from-home mom, are a work-outside-the-home mom, or do the hard work of a stay-at-home mom, it’s easy to feel that we are missing out or that we must be doing something wrong. Otherwise, it’d be easier, right?
I work for a company whose mission I love, that allows me to be flexible, and that understands that my family comes first. I have an endlessly supportive husband, and we live close to family. My situation is not the case for most, and we live in a culture that makes having children and working incredibly difficult. We need to work to build more support structures for families in our society and to reach out to the parents in our communities who are struggling.
But, what can we do in the day to day? How can we find any sort of peace or balance — or even have the energy to reach out to others — when we are pulled in so many different directions?
St. Bernard of Clairvaux said, “If then you are wise, you will show yourself rather as a reservoir than as a canal. A canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, and a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus without loss to itself communicates its superabundant water.”
We need to let God fill us with a reservoir of His grace through prayer so that we can love our families and do our work out of a place of abundance rather than a place of burnt-out emptiness. We need to, as 1 Peter 5:7 encourages us, “Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you.”
Here are some ways to incorporate prayer into your day as a mom so that you can be filled with a reservoir of God’s grace:
Start Your Day With Prayer
I notice a marked difference between the mornings I actually stop and pray before my son wakes up and the mornings I go straight to answering emails. It’s here, at the beginning of each day, that we have the chance to fill our cup before turning to the day ahead.
My favorites: a quick morning offering, journaling, or 10 minutes in silent prayer in front of a crucifix.
Pray for People in Different Life Situations Than You
If you struggle with patience with your kids, pray for people who long for children. If you struggle with your work, pray for people who are seeking work. If you struggle to keep up with household tasks, pray for people who are homeless.
This humbling prayer practice keeps me from sinking into a state of being ungrateful. Instead of “I have to wash these dishes,” it becomes, “I get to wash these dishes, and I’m grateful to have a home, running water, and a family to eat with.”
Discern Whether You Need to Make a Change
When we stop, take a good look at our circumstances, and bring them to prayer, we might notice that we do, indeed, need to change something. Perhaps we can get up or go to bed earlier. Perhaps we can ask our neighbor to watch the kids while we do a workout or talk with a therapist. Perhaps we need to talk with our spouses or support system and ask for more help. Perhaps we need to reconsider if our current job is right for us.
Often, we avoid these difficult topics in prayer, because we know they will take energy and strength to deal with. If you are considering a big transition, such as a move or career change, try out the Making Decisions praylist on Hallow to bring God into your decision-making.
When the Day Is Done, Place Everything in God’s Hands
I used to work in a pregnancy help center, and the work was beautiful, heartbreaking, and overwhelming. One of my co-workers was a woman who had been working there a long time, and I asked her how she handled it, day after day. She gave me some advice I will never forget:
At the end of each workday, before leaving, stop, close your eyes, and imagine Jesus in front of you. Gently lay each and every worry, joy, painful moment, and stress at his feet. Only once you’ve given it all to God can you return home and fill your reservoir again for the next day.
I found this prayer from St. Edith Stein (Teresa Benedicta) years later, and I think of it often at the end of a long or frustrating day:
“And when night comes, and you look back over the day and see how fragmentary everything has been, and how much you planned that has gone undone, and all the reasons you have to be embarrassed and ashamed: just take everything exactly as it is, put it in God’s hands and leave it with Him.”
From one often-overwhelmed working mom to another, know of my prayers for you as we navigate together this tough and beautiful vocation.
Abby Fredrickson studied English and theology at Notre Dame and is grateful for a job that lets her use both as head of content at Hallow. Her favorite things include making her husband and toddler laugh, spending time with friends, hearing people’s life stories, and being outside, especially on the beach. You can reach her at abby@hallow.app.
Don’t miss Hallow’s #Pray40 Challenge, a Lent community prayer challenge centered around growing the virtues of the patron of the Universal Church during the Year of St. Joseph. Members of the Catholic Women in Business community can receive a three-month free trial by signing up here.