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“For a Time Like This”: Informal Leadership and Queen Esther

Taryn DeLong

“I understood that every flower created by Him is beautiful, that the brilliance of the rose and the whiteness of the lily do not lessen the perfume of the violet or the sweet simplicity of the daisy. I understood that if all the lowly flowers wished to be roses, nature would no longer be enameled with lovely hues. And so it is in the world of souls, Our Lord’s living garden” (St. Thérèse of Lisieux).

Did you love the story of Esther when you were a little girl? I did. Amid so many stories of men fighting battles in the Old Testament is this story of a woman who saved her people with her courage—courage not to win a war but to challenge a frightening man to do the right thing.

I never really related to St. Joan of Arc, who led an army into battle, or Judith, who cut off Holofernes’ head and saved her people. I was afraid to talk to most people; something like fighting in a war was impossible to imagine. But Esther always resonated.

In case you haven’t read the Book of Esther in a while (or don’t remember watching her episode in the ‘90s TV series “Adventures From the Book of Virtues,” like I do), here’s a quick synopsis: Esther, a Jew, is forced to marry King Ahasuerus (after he deposes his first wife because she disobeyed him), because he finds her beautiful. King Ahasuerus’ grand vizier, Haman, convinces Ahasuerus to sentence all his Jewish subjects to death. Esther’s cousin Mordecai, who raised her, asks her to intercede for her people:

“Do not imagine that you are safe in the king’s palace, you alone of all the Jews. Even if you now remain silent, relief and deliverance will come to the Jews from another source; but you and your father’s house will perish. Who knows—perhaps it was for a time like this that you became queen?” (Esther 4:13-14).

Esther asks the king to spare her people, and Haman is executed.

Leading When You’re Not the Leader

Esther is queen, but it’s clear she has no formal authority. Ahasuerus is in charge (though arguably too persuadable when it comes to Haman!). When Mordecai asks her for help, he does not ask her to overturn the king’s edict to kill the Jews or to create a new ruling. He asks her to go to the king and change his mind.

Maybe you can relate: Maybe you aren’t an executive or a manager. Maybe you are what they call an “individual contributor” and feel like you don’t have much power within your organization. But having no formal power doesn’t mean you don’t have influence, particularly if you are liked and respected. You can still lead, even if leadership isn’t part of your job description.

“Informal leadership” is a term used to describe the influence someone has due to their reputation and the respect and trust others have for them rather than due to their position in an organization. You might be a subject matter expert—someone people come to for questions on a specific topic. Or, you might be someone who is exceptionally empathetic—a good listener whom people come to when they are upset or need to talk something out. Or, you might be someone who is a good communicator and can speak up in meetings with authority, even if no one technically “has to” listen to you. Regardless of how your informal leadership shows up, you can make an impact.

A related concept is “soft power,” a term that is usually used in the context of diplomacy but that Forbes contributor Penny Abeywardena recently used in the context of Twitter and its new CEO, Linda Yaccarino. While many have commented that Yaccarino’s appointment may be the most obvious example of a glass cliff we’ve seen, Abeywardena suggested that Yaccarino may be able to use soft power to turn Twitter into a profitable company:

If she uses soft power, the ability to set informal norms and standards within Twitter, across the Twitterverse, and throughout the social media world, she could quite possibly be a significant, maybe even transformative, figure.

Humility and Courage: The Skills of an Informal Leader

In addition to soft power, there are a few key skills that effective informal leaders—including Queen Esther—excel at, including humility and courage.

Humility

Esther demonstrated humility in the way she approached God and her husband. She knew that approaching the king and demanding that he save her people would not be an effective way to influence him. Instead, she humbled herself, first in prayer:

“Save us by your power, and help me, who am alone and have no one but you, Lord. You know all things. You know that I am under constraint, that I abhor the sign of grandeur that rests on my head when I appear in public. I abhor it like a polluted rag, and do not wear it in private. I, your servant, have never eaten at the table of Haman, nor have I graced the banquet of the king or drunk the wine of libations. From the day I was brought here till now, your servant has had no joy except in you, Lord, God of Abraham. O God, whose power is over all, hear the voice of those in despair. Save us from the power of the wicked, and deliver me from my fear” (Esther 4:25-30).

Then, she humbled herself in front of the king:

“If I have found favor with you, O king, and if it pleases your majesty, I ask that my life be spared, and I beg that you spare the lives of my people. For we have been sold, I and my people, to be destroyed, killed, and annihilated. If we were only to be sold into slavery I would remain silent, for then our distress would not have been worth troubling the king” (Esther 7:3-4).

Humility is essential for good leadership. In fact, Jim Collins’ research on great organizations (published in his popular book “Good to Great”) found that great organizations have leaders who are not only competitive but also humble. Other research supports the idea that humble leaders are more effective.

It makes sense; leaders need to be able to receive feedback so they can know where they need to improve, they need to be able to admit when they’re wrong, and they need to be able to take multiple perspectives into account when making decisions.

Informal leadership requires humility as well. This humility creates the self-awareness to identify where you have influence and where you don’t and to know how to use that influence. When you don’t have any formal authority, it sometimes takes humility to approach people, particularly the people who do have that authority, to make a difference. It requires listening before persuading and understanding and meeting other people’s needs—all of which take humility.

For help growing in humility, check out these articles:

Courage

Humility does not necessarily mean timidity, though. Informal leadership requires confidence and courage—because if you aren’t confident in yourself (and in God working through you) and courageous enough to speak up, how can you influence others?

Queen Esther knew courage. She was frightened, with good reason. Her people’s lives—and potentially her own—were at stake. But, as many people wiser than I have pointed out, courage isn’t not being afraid. It’s doing the right thing even when you’re afraid. Esther found her courage in prayer and used it to save her people.

James R. Detert, author of “Choosing Courage” and the John L. Colley Professor of Business Administration at the University of Virginia’s Darden School of Business, writes in a Harvard Business Review article that truly courageous leadership isn’t the old-fashioned view of the blustery tough guy. Rather, leadership requires:

  • Openness and humility (which we’ve already seen Queen Esther demonstrate).

  • Putting principles first (which Queen Esther did by choosing to do the right thing over her own safety and comfort).

  • Creating a safe environment for others (which Queen Esther did quite literally by saving the Jewish people).

I’d argue that these things are true for informal leadership as well. Informal leaders put their values first—otherwise, it would be all too easy to “stay in their lane.” They also contribute to a safe environment for others; while formal leaders have, perhaps, the most direct ability to create a safe workplace culture, ultimately, everyone plays a role in the team dynamic.

For help growing in courage, check out these articles:

Each of us living and working now was made for a time like this, to lead in whatever way we can. So humble yourself, ask God to guide you, and, in the words of Pope St. John Paul II (and Jesus!), “Do not be not afraid.”

Taryn DeLong is a Catholic wife and mother in North Carolina who serves as co-president and editor-in-chief of Catholic Women in Business. Her writing has appeared in publications such as FemCatholic, Natural Womanhood, CatholicMom.com, Radiant Magazine, and Live Today Well Co. She enjoys curling up with a cup of Earl Grey and a good novel, playing the piano, and taking walks in the sunshine with her family. Connect with Taryn: Twitter • Instagram • Facebook • LinkedIn • Blog • Substack