Using the 5 Stages of Change to Discern and Make a Transformation
“So you have failed? You cannot fail. You have not failed; you have gained experience. Forward!” (St. Josemaría Escrivá).
Editor’s note: We reached out to Regina Boyd to ask her to write this article after hearing her talk about the five stages of change on the Ave Spotlight Podcast from Ave Maria Press. Listen to it here.
As a therapist, I often find an assessment tool called the five stages of change to be helpful with my clients. This tool helps me understand how ready a person is to make a change in his or her life. The stages of change are referenced frequently in cases of addiction, but they apply to any area of life where we might be considering a change.
1. Pre-contemplation
In this first stage, most people are not aware of the need for change. They may be happy with their current state in life—or at least they say they are. This stage is also known as denial, because they are not yet acknowledging that there is a problem or a need for change.
The pre-contemplation stage could look like an unhealthy work environment in which someone tries to adapt and adjust but has not come to the definitive conclusion that it is unhealthy and he or she needs to make changes. For example, in a previous place of employment that was unhealthy, I tried to adapt and adjust in ways that became more stressful rather than helpful. My attempts to adapt did not reduce my stress, because they included things like working longer hours and accepting responsibilities not under my purview. My blood pressure was dangerously high, and I was easily fatigued in situations that previously were not tiresome. Distraction and difficulty focusing had also become my new normal. These signs crept in slowly; in the midst of my stress, it was difficult to recognize that work could be a cause.
2. Contemplation
The second stage is contemplation. Eventually, I came to a place where I acknowledged that my work environment was unhealthy and that I wanted change. However, I was not yet ready to take action. I thought frequently about the problem, shared it with my husband, and weighed various options. However, I did not make a final decision about how to handle the problem.
3. Preparation
Preparation is a period of research in which you find out what your options are. It was at this point that I was committed to making the change, which was my eventual exit from the company. I began to speak to colleagues who were in private practice and learned more about that option, including the steps necessary to create my own practice, like building a website and renting office space.
The preparation stage is foundational to the success of any major change. If people rush into the action stage too quickly, they may become overwhelmed by their newfound responsibilities. Preliminary research helps someone plan ahead and can provide a buffer against the unpredictable.
4. Action
The fourth stage is taking action. At this stage, an individual knows he or she is capable of change and takes the appropriate steps to make that change come about.
What I love about taking action is that it requires courage. There is a lot at risk when you make a change. For example, when I decided to set out on my own and start my own private practice, I risked failure and embarrassment. It takes courage to persevere despite your fears.
The other virtue that action requires is humility. Inevitably, you will make mistakes. Nothing ever goes according to plan, and these mistakes and deviations from the plan provide great opportunities for growth and learning. When we are able to recognize that errors are possible and have the humility to embrace those errors and to understand that we can’t know everything the first time we try, it gives us some motivation to move forward, which will help us to take action.
5. Maintenance
The final stage is maintenance. In this stage, we can successfully avoid temptations that pull us back into old habits or an old and healthy environment. It is a stage of continual growth; as progress happens and new obstacles arrive, we can make the necessary adjustments and continue moving forward based on what we have already learned.
When I started my private practice, I was still working full time in that other unhealthy environment; I worked for myself in the evening after my full-time job. It was a transformational experience for me, because I learned and grew so much. I learned what was necessary to maintain the decision to change, and I was motivated to do so because of the desire to leave that work environment. I learned what I needed to do in order to work in my private practice full time, and I did everything I could to strive for that goal.
Making a Change: Your Next Step
Think about a change that may need to happen in your own work life. Do you need more flexible hours? Is there a colleague at work with whom you frequently have conflict? Are you also in an unhealthy work environment? Whatever your experience is, determine which stage of change you are in right now. Think about how you can move from that stage to the next one and what baby step you need to make to get there. Then, take action! Do not fear—you've got this!
Regina Boyd founded Boyd Counseling Services, a Catholic licensed mental health practice based in Orlando that provides in-person and virtual therapy for couples, families, and teens. She works with clients who are experiencing life changes, desire healthy emotional connection, and seek to develop problem solving strategies within their relationships. Regina is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Licensed Mental Health Counselor. She is a wife and mother of a delightful daughter. In her spare time Regina enjoys walks with her family, baking, going live for her Facebook and Instagram followers, and listening to Mumford and Sons.