CWIB Book Review: “Sisterhood”
“The woman's soul is fashioned as a shelter in which other souls may unfold” (St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross).
Western society was talking about the prevalence of loneliness before the COVID-19 pandemic shut people off from co-workers, friends, and even family. In fact, the U.S. Health Resources & Services Administration (HRSA) called it a “loneliness epidemic” in 2019. Entering the pandemic already feeling lonely and with few strong friendships set up many people for depression, anxiety, and feelings of isolation.
Chloe Langr, host of the “Letters to Women” podcast, has responded to this crisis with a new book, “Sisterhood: Giving and Receiving the Gift of Friendship.” Aimed at women of all stages and walks of life, the book blends wisdom from the Church with practical, sisterly advice from Langr on how to make and nurture what Aristotle called “friendships of virtue.”
Eucharistic Friendship
Early in the book, Langr introduces the idea of “Eucharistic friendship”—friendship that’s not only modeled after Jesus’ relationships but that literally shares him with others.
This type of friendship has two elements, Langr writes. The first is humility; we must “make ourselves small and loveable, just like he does every day in the Eucharistic host.” The second “is that Christ himself dwells within us, which means that we can reveal him to others through the gift of friendship.”
This approach to friendship comes down to putting Christ at the center of our friendships, as we should put him at the center of every other aspect of our lives. Appropriately, then, the entire book is infused with Jesus; even the more practical “how tos” like how to be a good hostess have him at their heart. Langr not only makes recommendations like “always … make the same meal when hosting someone for the first time,” but she also makes recommendations like this one:
“When we first start hosting women, we can start by inviting Christ and Mary to be alongside us, hosting and serving others with us. But the more we grow in hospitality, we can take the next step of not only asking Jesus and Mary to be with us, but to be in us, to live their lives through us.”
When Friendship Is Hard
Langr doesn’t shy away from the challenges of friendship, particularly the ones we face in 2022, from pandemic isolation to digital relationships. In fact, she devotes an entire chapter to the relationships we form online and how to navigate them and, sometimes, take them offline. I particularly appreciated her reminder to always consider your intention when posting and commenting online.
Also relevant to me and, I think, to many women was her discussion of friendship during times of transition and during times “when friendship seems impossible.” Whether you’re a new graduate, a new mom, or a transplant to a new city, there is wisdom here for you. Langr also writes beautifully about the opportunity to make friends with saints; while they don’t replace friendships with women who are still here on earth with us, they can enrich our spiritual life and help us grow in virtue through their example and intercession:
“Regardless of which saint you get to know, every single woman in the heavenly cloud of witnesses wants to lead you closer to Christ. She wants to cheer you on in your daily life because she ultimately wants to get to know you face-to-face in heaven. Meeting the saintly women who we’ve befriended here on earth (or who have befriended us!) will be such a joyful reunion in the life to come.”
I was so touched by this image of meeting my saint friends when (with the grace of God) I see them in heaven!
Whether you want to deepen the friendships you already have, make new friends, or a combination of the two, “Sisterhood” will help you reflect on your relationships, understand what it means to be a good friend, and grow in who you are as a daughter of God and a sister to his other daughters.
Taryn Oesch DeLong is a Catholic wife and mother in North Carolina who encourages women to live out their feminine genius as co-president and managing editor of Catholic Women in Business, a FEMM fertility awareness instructor, and a contributor to publications for Catholic women. She enjoys curling up with a cup of Earl Grey and a good novel, playing the piano, and taking walks in the sunshine with her family. Connect with her on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn, or read her blog, Everyday Roses.