Striving for Community
“For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them” (Matthew 18:20).
Born into an earthly family with a mother and father, Jesus grew up in community. Eventually, he had his own community of followers, with an inner circle of disciples and a few he was even closer to.
We all live in some form of community, whether it be in a family, neighborhood, city, or business. At the same time, each of us is part of a greater Church community as well.
Why Do We Need Community?
Life is not meant to be lived alone. We’re meant to share our talents and our faith, to uplift and be uplifted by others. The desire to be seen, heard, and understood is a driving force for humanity, in our work and personal lives.
For most of history, humans have lived in communities with churches and extended families at their core. We’re all people in a complex world, seeking to know and be known.
As Catholics, we can look to the Bible and read Jesus’ call to community over and over again: “How good and how pleasant it is, when brothers dwell together as one!” (Psalm 133:1) and, “It is not good for [man] to be alone” (Genesis 2:18).
Being Catholic also means being a part of the universal Church and communing with others across time and space. In the Apostles Creed, we profess we believe in the communion of saints. U.S. Catholic explains,, “The best thing about the communion of saints is that it connects us all—because we are one body. When we celebrate the Eucharist, we pray with all those who have gone before us. We living can pray for the dead, “the souls in purgatory,” who need prayers on their journey to God. The multitude in heaven pray for the rest of us, inspire us by their example, and remain present to us in ways of which we know not.” What an incredible community to be a part of!
Although my first job post-college wasn’t lucrative, I’ll never forget being a part of a marketing and communications community, and the sense of connection and belonging that came from that. Knowing the importance of community has influenced my career decisions ever since that first position.
Finding Community
A few weeks ago, I read “Find Your People” by Jennie Allen, partly for my internal communications role at my new job and partly for myself. After growing up bouncing around every year or two, I’m looking forward to putting down roots where I now live. I’m getting to know my neighbors, co-workers, and parish. At the same time, I’m exploring how to build community and a sense of belonging in a hybrid work environment.
Here are a few ways you can say “yes” to community:
Put yourself out there. Friends can also come from different occupations or roles and be different ages. Sometimes, it helps to recognize that the friendships you make don’t have to be permanent.
Check out your parish community. It may have an organization you align with or a way to serve in fellowship. In college, one of my friends was passionate about cleaning the linens for the church. She took great care and great pride in this unique duty. It showed me that there are many ways to support the Mass beyond the ones that are easy to see on Sundays. You may even be called to start your own group.
Accept that it’s likely going to be awkward talking to new people or diving deeper with people you know, especially coming back from the pandemic. You can break the ice by acknowledging that it’s awkward!
Join our Catholic Women in Business online community! We have a Facebook group as well as virtual networking opportunities.
Leaning Into Your Community
Once you’re part of a community or have a new friend, it’s important to take the next step by being there for them and showing up during the tough times.
Support them: How can you pray for the people in your community? How can you guide them to goodness?
Ask for help: Just as they support you, don’t be afraid to turn to them. It can be hard, but friends really do want to help—so give them that opportunity to love and uplift. Being vulnerable is often the first step to a deeper friendship.
Show up: A big part of life is just showing up. It’s not about being the best; just being there is what people need and remember. One thing I’ve learned this year is that some people are too focused on serving others (God bless them!) to ask and receive help. If you have one of those friends, take action and show up, even if they don’t ask.
Creating Rituals, Routines, and Purpose
Shruthi (I know her from her Instagram account, @thehonestshruth) is a part of a Christian Bible study in which entire families (with toddlers!) come together each week. The women take care of the children first while the men meet. Then, they switch, with the women meeting together and the men taking care of the children.
I was part of a wonderful Bible study for a few years that started with a Blessed Brunch from Blessed Is She. At first, we used books from Blessed Is She. Then, we made it our own by choosing books that aligned with our group’s unique struggles and connections to different saints.
Of course, your group doesn’t have to be a Bible study group. You could also explore professional books to sharpen your career skills, explore a different lens on faith (like C.S. Lewis), or listen to a podcast. Another fun idea is working through a cookbook together, with each family or person making one of the meals each week.
We also want to look outward to be the hands and feet of Christ to others in our broader communities. This might mean volunteering together or hosting a baby shower for Mary. Starting annual traditions, like celebrating Advent or saying a certain novena together, can give your group roots and something to look forward to.
Together these ideas can help give your friendships greater meaning, purpose, and connection.
Learning More About Community
Next up on my reading list is “Start with Hello,” by Shannon Martin; “All are Welcome,” by Cynthia Owyoung; and the classic “Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of the American Community,” by Robert Putnam. I also loved this recent article by Taryn DeLong on her blog, Everyday Roses.
Savanna Polasek is a nonprofit communications specialist, freelance writer, and creator of Memoir Ink. She is a Catholic convert and lives with her charming husband and daughter in Austin, Texas. In her free time she enjoys exploring Texas, listening to Catholic podcasts, reading, and writing fiction. You can connect with her on LinkedIn.