Who Are the Mothers in Your Life?
“In the Spirit of Christ, in fact, women can discover the entire meaning of their femininity and thus be disposed to making a ‘sincere gift of self’ to others, thereby finding themselves” (Pope St. John Paul II).
May is not only the month we celebrate Mother’s Day, but also the month we honor our heavenly mother, Mary. As women, we are all called to be mothers: some biologically, some spiritually, some through adoption, some through friendship, some through mentorship or coaching. I recommend taking some time this month to reflect on all the women in your life who you have had the privilege to call mother and all the ways you are called to mother those around you.
What Is Mothering?
In a world that has redefined moms to “birthing people,” it is worth taking the time to reflect on what mothering is. First and foremost, a mother is a woman, and as such, she is endowed with a feminine genius unique to her. St. John Paul II in his apostolic letter Mulieris Dignitatem, notes that a woman has the unique ability to understand others and recognize their dignity through a sincere gift of herself. Through self-gift, she inspires, lifts up, and encourages those around her to also live out their inherent dignity and make the world a more loving place. Her dignity is based not on anything she can do or has done but simply because she is a daughter of God.
In general, women are more nurturing. They are able to recognize feelings and support others through emotional challenges. In the same way, biological mothers tend to emotionally support their children and teach them emotional intelligence. Often, a father is described as the head of the family and a mother as the heart. A mother provides a safe space, encouragement, and deep mercy within her family. She does not shy away from the truth but tends to offer correction in a more gentle way.
Mother Mary
Mary, the mother of Jesus, is the first and best example of a mother. She was obedient to God and to her husband, Joseph. She cared and provided for Jesus while accepting God’s will for him. She was there with Him as He suffered and died on the cross. Her heart broke, but she knew it was necessary and trusted God’s plan.
Mary is still our mother today. Have you taken time today to reflect on the ways she cares for you? Do you ask for her intercession in your life?
My Mom
I am blessed to call my mom one of my best friends. She is the one I call anytime I have a question or when things seem to be falling apart. She lives a mile away and loves to play with her grandkids and help care for them. Beyond that, she has always been my role model. She taught me how to work hard and try my best. I can talk to her about my struggles, fears, and worries. I am blessed to have a great relationship with my mom and am incredibly grateful for her.
How do you describe your relationship with your mom? Are there hard memories that need healing? Do you think of her with joy? How can you pray for her? Where do you need God to intervene in your relationship with her?
Coaches, Teachers, and Mentors
Growing up as an athlete and a high-achieving student, I had many coaches, teachers, and mentors. As I think about the differences between male and female coaches, I notice that they are similar to the differences between a father and mother. I was coached by some other pretty amazing women. Women who perfected their sports through hard work, perseverance, and dedication. Beyond that, they had a deep desire to guide and direct others to greatness. They truly cared about us as athletes and people. They did not just teach us to perfect our sport, but encouraged us to set goals, monitor achievements, and celebrate our wins. They sacrifice their time to help others become the best versions of themselves.
What coaches, teachers, and mentors have you had in your life? How did they mother you or shape you into the person you are today?
Friends
Deep authentic friendship is hard to find. I have many acquaintances, but lasting friendships are rare. A true friend holds you accountable to Catholic values, is there for you no matter what, encourages you to be the best version of yourself, offers a shoulder to cry on, and lifts you up when you fall. One of my best friends from college is not yet a physical mother, but she takes care of me when things get overwhelming. She reaches out to make sure I am taking care of myself. She plans weekend getaways for us when I’m too overwhelmed to plan one more thing. Not only have we grown deeper in our faith together, but she has supported me like a mother.
What friends do you have that help mother you? How do they care for you, challenge you, and support you when you are struggling?
While we are grateful for the gift of biological and physical motherhood, there are so many other ways to be a mother and to have a mother(s). As we reflect on our gratitude for our mothers this month, let us also reflect on the ways God is asking us to be a mother to everyone in our lives. Is there someone at work he is calling you to mother? Maybe there is someone in your parish he is asking you to mentor? Is he calling you to coach and mother the team? Motherhood looks different for every woman, but when we embrace our feminine genius and live authentically, God shows us how to be the mothers those in our lives need.
Erica Mathews is a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ Professional with Financial Counseling Associates, a family-owned financial planning and investment management firm. She helps relieve financial stress with organization, automation and a plan, helping others manage their finances so they can live as God is calling them to. She lives in Colorado with her husband and four kids; they love CrossFit, rock climbing, gardening, and exploring nature. Erica’s email is erica@fca-inc.com