Emotional Energy: Fearfully and Wonderfully Made
The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law (Galatians 5:22-23).
We don’t often think about the relationship between our emotions and our energy. Emotions both remit and require energy. Positive, growth-promoting emotions such as excitement, hope, and humility optimize happiness, performance and well-being. Negative, survival-based emotions include anger, frustration, and fear. Negative emotions can help us make decisions, but spending too much time with them can lead to anxiety, depression and burnout.
Where have you been the past several months, both during and prior to Lent? What kind of emotional energy do you give off? What kind of energy is being used for your emotions? These are important questions we’ll dive into.
Emotional energy includes how we manage and regulate our emotions and the related conditions of our inter-personal relationships. Fostering positive emotions improves both our connection to others and our well-being.
Acknowledging Our Current Energy Status
We know energy oscillates. (See the other articles in this series on Energy Management and Spiritual Energy.) We can move between high and low, and positive and negative several times in the same day. We interact with people, perform duties and fulfill responsibilities at work and home. We deal with situations, and react to local, national, and world events. Our energy is certainly impacted by the world around us.
Over the past six months, what kind of emotional energy have you had? Has it been more positive or negative, high or low? We have a general sense of our energy, even though it ebbs and flows. How is your energy impacting those around you – your family, friends, colleagues, and people you interact with? As hard as it may be, getting insight from a trusted person can help you better understand your energy vibes.
How well do you manage your emotions? For example, do you tend to react or respond? Reaction is an immediate defense mechanism while responding is a thoughtful, enhancing dialogue. Honestly assessing your emotional state builds awareness, and from awareness we can correct ourselves and make healthier choices. God wants us to flourish (John 10:10), to not be afraid (2 Timothy 1:7), and to obey His commandments (John 14:15), for interior peace and freedom from sin.
Inter-personal relationships
Since emotions are tied to the people in our lives, it’s time to examine how those around you impact your emotional energy. Ideally, we want to form close bonds with family and friends who are supportive, nurturing, loving, caring, and compassionate. Relationships in this space improve our well-being. Everyone regulates their emotions better when they feel supported. God does not want us to be selfish. We are called to serve (Mark 10:45). By nurturing and supporting the people around us, we all reap the emotional benefits as well.
Practices to Consider
There are many faith-based practices to consider when working to improve your emotional energy, manage your emotions and improve your relationships. Gratitude – found time and again in the Bible – draws us close to God. In its best form, the humble practice of gratitude should be daily, built into prayer. However, if you are new to the practice, start with a few times a week, giving thanks to God in everything (Ephesians 5:20).
How often do you frequent the sacraments? In them, we remember who we belong to and how He desires to be close to us. You can’t get much closer than the Eucharist when you become a tabernacle for the Lord. Adoration is a wonderful way to spend “alone” time with Jesus and can be just a few minutes before or after Mass, a separate time of the week sitting in front of the blessed host, or part of a formal event at your church. When those don’t work with your schedule, just sitting quietly in a space by yourself talking to the Lord can make a big difference.
The Sacrament of Reconciliation brings peace, and a deeper connection with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. When we realize we are forgiven (over and over again!), it helps us to better forgive people around us (Matthew 6:14-15).
Within the practice of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), or cognitive behavior skills-building, there is a foundational principle called the Thinking-Feeling-Behaving triangle. How we think affects how we feel, which affects our actions (behavior). One of the main facets of CBT is reframing your thoughts. You catch a negative thought, acknowledge it, and change it. Although it takes practice, small positive changes in your thoughts can make a big difference in your emotions, energy and relationships. With a Christian therapist, CBT can be done with the Lord guiding you in the reframing process.
Exercise, getting 7-9 hours of sleep per night, and eating healthier foods most of the time can also improve your emotional state. Think about the last time you didn’t eat for a long period of time – does the word hangry ring a bell? We don’t want to be hangry people if we are to be the light and salt to the world (Matthew 5:14-15).
A question that comes up is the practice of yoga and meditation. Although the Church does not have an official statement on the practices, Catholics need to be careful. Yoga and meditation take the person “inward”, focusing on the self for inner peace. Christians are dependent on God, not the self. If a Christian-based yoga or meditation class exists near you, this can be a strategy to consider.
If you suspect your emotions are unstable, or you have not felt emotionally well for a while, it may be time to seek professional help. There are Christian-based counselors, but non-Christian professional counseling can be helpful. Your local diocese can provide referrals to trusted counselors. If your situation is more urgent, please reach out to the 988 suicide and crisis lifeline.
Megan Amaya is an associate clinical professor, director of health & wellness, board-certified health coach, and certified group fitness instructor.